11
Dec
10

ommmm. . .

My husband bought this “Zen” alarm clock for me for my birthday:

It’s a beautiful clock — the bamboo matches our newly-installed floors, and the alarm is a gentle chime that wakes you gradually so that you’re not wrested, writhing and resentful, from your deep and restful sleep.

The way this works is that the hammer strikes the bell first ~ 10 minutes before the time for which your alarm has been set. Around 3 minutes later it chimes again, and then continues, at increasing intervals according to a reversal of  the Golden Mean (also known as the Fibonacci Series, constructed by adding the previous 2 numbers in the series 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 etc.).

It actually works quite well. My concern at first was that the lack of insistence would make it unlikely that it would wake me at all. In fact, the first chime arouses me enough to realize that I will have to be getting up soon, and I adjust my dreams, and my expectations, accordingly. Yesterday morning I actually dreamt that the chimes continued, and that I had gotten up and turned the alarm off before the clock had actually chimed a second time. At that point I thought, well, as long as I’m awake. . . This morning it chimed once, I smiled and rolled over and hugged my pillow and then realized that I needed to use the “lav,” and got up before the second chime. My husband was curious, though, so I left the clock on so he could listen to it increase in frequency.

We then devised a series of “instructions,” as the clock would deliver if it could speak:

Chime 1: Good morning!

Chime 2: It’s going to be a beautiful day!

Chime 3: You might want to start thinking about getting up soon.

Chime 4: Hello? Is there anybody in there?

Chime 5: You know, you’re not doing anybody any favors just lying there like a lump.

Chime 6: If you don’t get your lazy a$& out of bed things are going to get really unpleasant.

Chime 7: ding   ding   ding  ding dingdingdingdingdingdingdngdngdng

We’ll see if I ever make it that far.

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6 Responses to “ommmm. . .”


  1. December 11, 2010 at 6:23 pm

    Now a clock that speaks to the sleeper like that might be a good idea. Especially one that you actually program to say specific things. It would set such a nicer tone for the day. I don’t need an alarm as I have a dog. And a cat.

  2. December 12, 2010 at 12:57 am

    I actually have this on my Christmas list! I’m the kind of person who can hit the ‘snooze’ button three times before getting out of bed so it’s likely I’ll get to chime #7.

  3. December 12, 2010 at 3:19 pm

    What a thoughtful husband you have! This sounds like the perfect gift for you

  4. December 12, 2010 at 4:52 pm

    It’s a pretty clock, and I know I’d like the chimes. My husband likes to be wakened by a buzzing alarm or early morning radio –Ugh.

    I have an alarm clock that can be programmed for wave noises, rain, or railroad sound (the click clack on the train tracks), as well as radio (which I don’t use). I like it, but it can also be used to help you go to sleep, and that’s why I originally purchased it after moving to NYC — to mask the noise. Quickly realized I couldn’t use it for both things, i.e., to put me to sleep AND wake me up. Too confusing. So I used it as a sleep aid for a while. Then I discovered earplugs, which are much more effective!

    Now, if I need to be wakened by an alarm clock I set mine and wake up to the sound of waves, which I like very much. But my alarm clock is not nearly as attractive as yours!

  5. December 12, 2010 at 5:35 pm

    In a postscript — my alarm failed to wake me up this morning.
    But not because it was too gentle; because I set it, but forgot to turn it on.
    How “Zen” is that?


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